Top 6 Britney Spears Music Videos to Pump me/you up for a Client Presentation

Let’s get right to it.

6.

slave4u

“I’m a Slave 4 U” is a classic B. Spears music video. The choreography, the underwear over jeans, the sauna party. It makes me remember all the metaphorical and sometimes literal sweat that goes into the work and makes me feel like I can get it get it, get it get it.

5.

oops

“Oops! …I Did it Again” I made you believe you love these ideas. Oh baby, baby. Also, maybe I should wear a pleather jumpsuit to work? Wait, no. 

4.

everytime

“Everytime” is for when I remember that none of this shit matters and everyone hates advertising, but then I remember that if Stephen Dorff can believably land the roll of Britney’s boyfriend in a music video, I can do anything!!!

3.

workbitch

“Work B**ch” is an anthem. It’s iconic. Please buy my commercial.

2.

toxic

“Toxic” reminds me that if Britney Spears can do a back handspring through laser beams, I can sell a friggin’ ad campaign.

1.

stronger

“Stronger” is my #1 pump-me-up favorite and personally, I think it’s highly underrated. Britney is a one woman machine, but in this video she shares the screen with a sleek metal chair with a mind of its own that’s essential to her choreography. It reminds me of the importance of teamwork and collaboration to get to the finished product and when in doubt, just crimp your hair and walk dramatically towards camera/into the meeting.

That’s all! Hail Britney!

 

britney

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One Night at SUR

Whenever my best friend/creative life partner Danae and I go to LA for work we always go to SUR because we’re trash.

We went there for dinner once which was a mistake we won’t make twice. Trust me, it’s essentially just Lean Cuisine minus the Goat Cheese Balls which are v good. Stassi wasn’t lying, but it’s not about the food, right?!

So one night last week, Danae and I walked into the lounge and had a seat at the last open “table” literally right behind the hostess stand and directly in front of the DJ booth. Imagine walking into a dimly lit pre-school and sitting down at a table where tiny humans are coloring or drinking martinis or whatever. The tables in the SUR lounge are a good inch and a half shorter than that.

After we took our seats on the floor, we looked to our left at the bar where episodes of Vanderpump Rules play in continuous loop on the TV above the LVP Sangria. And then there she was… SCHEANA, in all her evil arched eyebrow, thigh high boot, SUR uniform glory. Peter walks over to us, dead eyed, and asks us “what we want” and then disappears for like 20 minutes. What service! It’s cool though, maybe it’s not about the “drinks” either. After we finally got our $15 raspberry mojitos which were 70% mint leaves, 5% raspberries, 20% seltzer water, 5% regret and exactly 0% alcohol, in walks DJ James Kennedy and a bunch of dudes we didn’t recognize. “It’s my buthday!!” DJ James shouts as Scheana, who had been standing by the bar, (working hard!) for a solid 25 minutes at this point, squeaks with delight and gives leaping hugs all around. A girl at a different kids table asks for a pic and they all oblige and then disappear into the neon purple haze.

sur

It was an out of bra experience that was more than we could have ever asked for and 100% more than we could handle.

We sucked down our drinks. Took three super cute photo booth boomerangs and then ran away screaming… until our next Sexy Unique Restaurant Restaurant & Lounge adventure.

Happy Birthday, DJ James Kennedy! Enjoy your pasta!! *wink*

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Confessions of the Dashboard Variety

Sad music makes me happy. Most people can’t wrap their head around that notion, but it’s true.

I started listening to pop punk in high school. New Hampshire. Early 2000’s. Wearing studded belts and sneaking out to go see Taking Back Sunday. Absolutely losing it when I heard Something Corporate play “Konstantine” during their opener for Yellowcard. Posting Dashboard Confessional lyrics in 90% of my AIM away messages and drinking shitty beer in cul-de-sacs with my friends while “From Under The Cork Tree” blasted through someone’s equally shitty car speakers. It ruled.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

(16 year old, teen angst Madison in my sisters dorm room at Keene State College.)

After my first soul crushing heartbreak I found Chiodos. Woah. I remember seeing Craig and the boys play a tiny venue off Main Street in Nashua, NH. Feeling fucked up was the price of entry and every scream made my cold heart race and absolutely destroyed my ear drums.

When my parents decided to not be married anymore, I found Atreyu. Then came Senses Fail, Silverstein, The Used, Brand New, Thrice and my true love, UNDEROATH. My sister and I got sunburnt in parking lots every summer at Warped Tour and one time I wore a t-shirt that said “I Hate Myself and I Want to Die” to a Taste of Chaos which was… a bad look.

Then I met a boy who listened to Nirvana, The Shins, Led Zeppelin, Arcade Fire, The Stones, Radiohead… I fell in love with him and with Kurt Cobain and Thom Yorke and Elliott Smith and Stevie Nicks and all the rest. My musical taste shifted, but the sullen undertones never did.

I went through a hippie phase, a truly mortifying EDM-sunglasses-indoors phase and a whatever-my-then-current-boyfriend-was-listening-to-at-the-time phase.

And then I met Danae. Who I’m happy to report, is not a phase. I remember listening to Taking Back Sunday in her car and having it all come right back to me. I had stopped listening to pop punk, but just because I stopped listening didn’t mean all the bands I loved stopped making music. I was a poser and I had a lot to catch up on.

We got a job together at an ad agency, moved to Chicago in 2014 and discovered a little place called Beauty Bar and Emo vs. Pop Punk night every Sunday. Just like that, it was on.

beautybar

(Me and Danae at Emo vs. Pop Punk Night @ the most beautiful bar in all the land.)

The last bunch of years have been concert after concert. Warped Tour, Riot Fest. You name it, we’re there. I still love all the classics, but my playlist has expanded a bit.

We’ve got the Chicago scene: Real Friends & Knuckle Puck.

The up–and-comers: Capstan, Moose Blood, Boston Manor, Turnover, Northbound.

And the hot list: The Story So Far, Have Mercy, State Champs, Mayday Parade, Neck Deep, Bayside, Transit + way more. Check them out!

The pop punk scene is alive and well. I came back for nostalgia and stayed because Chris Carrabba is an absolute angel on earth and we don’t deserve him.

Sad girls forever.

sadaf

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The Last 16 Songs I Listened to ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You know, in case you were wondering.

  1. Angeles- Elliot Smith https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQrhA6QtWOM 
  2. Exit Music (For a Film)- Radiohead https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8051Hipbmmw
  3. The Best Deceptions- Dashboard Confessional https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiqXGEV1Bms
  4. Violence- Blink-182 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpxFhvT_GME
  5. Colorblind- Between the Buried and Me https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CML76r97Xv8
  6. Alive with the Glory of Love- Say Anything https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PFR5s96jGeg
  7. How’s It Going to Be?- Third Eye Blind https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Za5wwxsuvhw
  8. Creep- Ember Island https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uws8KdoDJs8
  9. The Bird and the Worm- The Used https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12dBCgAoRA 
  10. Smile- The Story So Far https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7FauV3MIUU
  11. Colder Quicker- Real Friends https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWq027KIPuM
  12. The Day is My Enemy- Prodigy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1AaKBbNGkk
  13. Welcome to the Black Parade (Steve Aoki Remix)- My Chemical Romance  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHbEl9mqzRs
  14. Mix Tape- Brand New https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHgAx7clkLk
  15. Death of a Bachelor- Panic! At The Disco https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R03cqGg40GU
  16. Hurricane- Thrice https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eC3xaEw9PSM

There it is. I’M OKAY (TRUST ME). ❤

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2016 so far

(sound on plz)

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How to Cut the Shit and Be Happy Already

Sticks

Woahhhh, you guys. Big changes happening in my life this year. Lots of crazy energy and vibrations coming at me from every angle. While change is good and exciting, it’s also pretty scary and full of uncertainty. I’ve had to sit in a lot of fear, sadness, anger and confusion lately… you know, all the good stuff.

While all of that can be pretty uncomfortable, it means that I’m growing and growing is LIT. Life isn’t about feeling good all the time. Anyone that says they feel good all the time is absolutely full of shit. Sometimes it can be hard to shake some of the bullshit, but there are some simple ways to pick yourself up, let go of the things that aren’t serving you and feel a little better. This is what works for me. I hope it can work for you, too.

SWEATING HELPS– Feeling shitty? Want to not feel shitty? MOVE. YOUR. BODY. Try something fun like Soulcycle or yoga. I like to do group classes because I’m less likely to quit halfway through, although I cannot promise anything. Workout at least three times a week. Try for more. Endorphins make you happy and happy people just don’t kill their husbands.  

TAME YOUR BRAIN– Can’t get someone off your mind? Every time they pop into your head, imagine them putting mayo on pizza and the thought will quickly evaporate out of your brain space because that’s fucking gross. 

EAT ICE CREAM– Ever heard of Halo Top? It’s 240 calories per pint and high in protein so you can eat the whole damn thing and still stay a skinny bitch. You’re welcome.

LISTEN TO THE MUSIC PLAY– I like sad music the most because it speaks to my dark sullen soul, but when I’m depressed as fuck, listening to “Videotape” on repeat on my bus ride home usually ends with me wanting to walk out in front of it. So maybe don’t do that. Backstreet Boys is always a good choice! Pick something with a beat and bop around. If people on the street look at you like you’re crazy, IT’S WORKING.

DON’T COMPARE– For the love of god, stop doing this! Acceptance is one of the many keys to feeling bouts of real happiness. It’s really fucking hard, but as soon as you can be at peace with what you have and how things are, right now in this very moment, you’ll breathe a little easier and feel a little lighter. You have everything you need.

CHANGE UP YOUR LOOK– Dye your hair blue! Rock some casual sequins! Wear purple lipstick! Dude? Grow a beard! Stop wearing cargo shorts!

GO THE FUCK OUTSIDE– Fly out to Park City and go on hikes with your mom. Skip around in the woods. Take your baby niece to the park and push her on a swing while she laughs. Take your dog out to play and let him take a shit on some flowers. Go to the beach and get sand literally everywhere. Go to a concert with friends. Go to a concert by yourself. Lay on some grass and look for dick shaped clouds in the sky. Whatever! Just get out there!

CALL YOUR FAMILY Talking on the phone blows, but hearing your grandma tell you that she’s proud of you and that she loves you is some kind of wonderful. Suck it up and pick up the phone. Beep, beep, boop: happiness.

FRIENDSHIP! Spend as much time as possible with the people who love and understand you. Old friends! New friends! All the friends! Go see obscure emo bands that you love so fucking much, go try out all the bowling alleys in your city, go eat so much pizza, Facetime friends who live far away, go out and dance until 2am, go to an amateur WWE match and throw tampons on the stage and laugh so hard that one of your friends collapses and smacks her head on the seat in front of her and it leaves a mark. Go let yourself have some fucking fun! Seriously, go!

EYE FUCK SOME LITERATURE– “Take a risk, take a chance, make a change and reeeeeaaaddd aaaa book.” -Kelly Clarkson  

SAY NO- *Occasionally* it is 100% okay to stay in, turn your phone off,  turn some music on, take a glorious bubble bath and then go to bed at 9pm. Treat yo self.

EAT/DRINK GREEN THINGS You’ll be fitter, happier, more productive and smoothies are delicious. 

BE YOURSELF Sometimes this can feel like the hardest thing to do. We adapt to our surroundings, it’s human nature, it’s a safety net, but when you act how you think other people want you to, you end up crushing your spirit. Never change yourself for someone else, don’t dull your sparkle. You are perfect exactly the way you are. You have permission to be yourself, always. But like, be nice.

FEEL YOUR FEELINGS If you want to move past a negative emotion, recognize it when it pops up, say hello, hang out with it for a little bit and see what it’s trying to tell you and then send it on it’s way. If you want to cry, let it out! Call your mom 6 times in one day, scream into a pillow, listen to a pop punk cover of “You Oughta Know” on repeat during an early morning flight. Sometimes certain feelings stay longer than others, but if you allow yourself to feel them instead of numbing out, they will always pass. Promise.

BREATHE In for 4 out for 4. In for 6 out for 8. Deep breaths. Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit. Ommmmmmmmm.

And when all else fails, go pet a puppy.

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